The other day, a groggy Saturday morning, I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth in an attempt to freshen up. My 11 year old brother came up to me with a very worried expression on his face. "My feet hurt really bad, and they are numb!" came the urgent complaint. I looked at him through my droopy eyes, and said "did thoo hust wake upf?" through my brushing. "Yes!" He is now running warm water into the bathtub behind me as I brush my teeth.
I spit. "well, it's probably cause you slept on them wrong or have a cramp. Or maybe its growing pains."
He looks at me a moment, dolefully, then back at his submerged feet. "No," he decides, "I think I have gout."
Me. "uh, Joseph, gout only happens in your big toe." (not true, but I wanted to get his mind off of it."
Joseph, panic stricken, "Now it's only in my big toe!!!"
Sheesh...hypocondriac. I think it was Little Lord Fauntleroy who introduced this illness to him.
